30 Innings of Misery

As Kattobase Barnetto so eloquently chronicled, waiting out an extra inning loss is one of the most frustrating experiences a fan can have. However, Kattobase had an even more frustrating experience in 2001, when he worked as an intern at Pac Bell Park. At the end of May, he got to experience two consecutive extra-inning losses to the Diamondbacks. The first game went twelve innings, and the second lasted eighteen. In those thirty innings, the Giants scored one single run.

Kattobase was stuck at the stadium for the duration, while I watched all thirty innings from the couch. I was with him in spirit, though my corporeal body spent time checking email, drinking beer, and speculating as to Kattobase's mental state when he returned home. If the Giants won, it was an epic classic. If they lost, it was the worst cock tease of Kattobase's sports fan existence.

Henry Schulman called it, "one of the greatest games in San Francisco Giants history" and "certainly one of the most maddening." Armando Rios said, "It's like someone who swims all the way from the ocean, swimming and swimming and swimming, then gets to the shore and dies."

Marvin Benard went 0-for-9. Armando Rios was 1-for-13, with four strikeouts. When h wasn't getting walked, Barry Bonds was 0-for-9. Only Rich Aurilia acquitted himself well at the plate, reaching base in half of his plate appearances.

Here's how the misery went down:

First game

6th inning: The Giants turn three singles into zero runs.

10th: Felipe Crespo ties the game with the first-ever, non-Bonds home run into McCovey Cove. Russ Davis strikes out with runners on second and third.

12th: Mark Grace homers into the cove. Zerbe gets out of a bases-loaded, no-out jam with no one else scoring. Giants lose.

Second game

1st inning: Marvin Benard gets picked off first base, but advances to third on a wild throw. He then tries to score on a not-so-wild pitch, and is tagged out easily.

3rd: Aurilia doubles, Bonds gets walked intentionally, and Kent flies out.

8th: With a man on second, Bonds is walked intentionally ahead of Kent, who strikes out.

11th: With runners on first and second, Armando Rios strikes out while Aurilia is thrown out trying to steal third.

13th: Aurilia walks, and when the Diamondbacks shift their infielders, Bonds hits into a 6-5-3 double play.

14th: With two men on, Martinez lines into a double play.

17th: Rios doubles, and Santiago sacrifices him to third. After an intentional walk, Rios is thrown out at home on a grounder to first.

18th: Ryan Vogelsong gives up the first run of the game in the top of the inning. Having exhausted their bullpen in the previous thirty innings, the Giants let Vogelsong hit for himself. He responded with a double, his first major league hit. The Giants eventually loaded the bases with one out, but Sonny Jackson, the worst third base coach in history, decided not to send Vogelsong on a potential game-tying sacrifice fly to center.

Postscript: Russ Davis was released three weeks later. Rios and Vogelsong were traded for Jason Schmidt two months later. Kattobase did some anguished drinking once he got home, but returned to work the very next night, when the Giants lost by one run once again.

13th Inning Cock Tease

As a freelance sports producer, often times I'm out of work for an entire week. It's feast or famine. This week happens to be famine. When this happens my maternal instincts kick in. So I decided, let me make dinner for the breadwinner, my wife, Jessica. So I was writing a grocery list last night, compiling all of things I'd need to put together dinner the next day, and I found that the Giants were still on.

What a treat, Tuesday night, extra innings baseball, at no cost to me. And what's the first thing I see: The Commish, Bud "in spite of himself" Selig. I was pleased to see him there. I didn't think he'd show for the Bonds Home Run Death March. But there he was with that twisted grin, the Emperor Palpatine to Barry's Darth Vader.

I'm not really a big Selig fan, as you may have guessed, partly because I just hate authority figures, but mainly because he's handled the steroids issue so poorly. That being said, I appreciate him showing up to follow Barry, it was the right thing to do. Although, I secretly hope that he has to carry Barry's jock strap around for at least a week or two before #25 hits the big one.

How did I get so horribly sidetracked? I was talking about my grocery list. As I watched the game, I jotted down both my culinary needs and my thoughts on the 13 inning Giants loss. I'll do my best to transpose my notes/list.

- Bacon

- Whole leaf lettuce

- Barry Bonds should get the bat off his shoulder. 42 strikeouts next to his 100 walks isn't so shabby. But it does seem as though he used to hit that 3-2 count low inside strike. Now he just expects the umpire to give him the benefit of the doubt.

- Black Tea

- First we'll use Sanchez; then we'll use Chulk; then an attack; from the Incredible Hulk. This game will turn out bad, mark my words. If only a giant green monster would take the field and cause a stir, then Bud Selig would be forced to call the game a tie.

- Trader Joe's Garlic Fries

- Tomato

- I don't know what's more depressing; watching Willie Harris score easily all the way from 1st base, or watching Bonds chase down ("chase" is the wrong word, how about "hobble") that same bases clearing double.

- Cereal

- Who the hell is Tyler Yates? For that matter, who the hell is Fred Lewis? If the Giants really need someone to stand in the batters box and look at a game ending strike three, my calendar is pretty clear.

Hope you enjoyed my Turkey Club. If you need a Sports Producer or a Short Order Cook, call my agent.

Laughing at the Expense of Sabean

The weekend brought mixed results. Tim Lincecum looked outstanding. Barry Zito look dreadful. But we did win a series on the road.

Three funny things I overheard this weekend:

"I can't believe we're winning."

"What kind of hitter strikes out after taking the count to 3-and-0?"

"Aww man... The top of the lineup... that sucks."

Ways Bonds Can Become Even More Hated

As Barry Bonds gets closer and closer to the all-time home run record, public opinion gets more and more negative. Is there a way Bonds could become more hated? Yes. Here's how:

Grow a full beard, like an evil alternate dimension Star Trek crew member.

New walkup music: The Imperial March from Star Wars.

Expand the elbow guard so that it covers all but 15% of his arm.

Go beyond standing in the batter's box to admire home runs. Carry a small digital camera and take a picture of the ball in flight before slowly circling the bases.

Push for the return of Sonny Jackson as third base coach.

Admit to providing a five-year-old Darren Baker with "the clear" and "the cream".

Move the recliner into the dugout and sit in it between innings.

Change back to his old uniform number, Willie Mays's retired #24. Ask, "When was it the team retired Willie's number? After he won his seventh MVP award, or after he hit his 700th home run? Help me out, I can't remember."

Make a large and public show of support for beleaguered team mascot Lou Seal.



Wear the same dirty helmet for the rest of the season. In August, stop changing socks. After Labor Day, don't wash uniform pants or jock strap.

Punch Tim Lincecum in the face, for no good reason at all.

In a live interview, tell Mike Krukow that he doesn't know a goddamn thing about a kangaroo court, and he never will. Then add, "Put the microphone down, meat."

Start hanging out with she-male, muscular type strippers.

Put together a new promotional "Say Hey" campaign for the upcoming season. "I didn't commit perjur-ay! Say hey!"

Begin referring to own bowel movements as "splash hits".

After every intentional walk, behead a live chicken and hang it on the right field wall.

Release documents revealing that, in addition to putting Jason Giambi in contact with trainer/steroid distributor Greg Anderson, Barry also masterminded Giambi's wussy deodorant ad campaign.



Win the World Series.

(Adapted from this.)

It's an Embarassment for me to be Writing this Flippin' Blog

In a my continuing efforts to include my wife in each of my posts, I would like to recount a conversation I had with my bride the day after the All-star game.

Jessica: Don't you think you're being a little pessimistic? I mean, the Giants might not make the playoffs but are they really the worst team in the west?

Barnetto: I don't know... I suppose they could come out of the gate and sweep the Dodgers... But that's pretty much the only thing that could hold this season together.

Needless to say, my sweep prediction came true, only the wrong way around. The boys in blue dealt us a season ending 3-game sweep. The Dodgers have now beaten us 11 straight times at home. So my prediction of a Giants sweep was sort of a jinx. So in an effort to double-jinx the Giants, I would like to predict that the Giants will lose every single game for the remainder of the season.

Barry Bonds is another story altogether. 0-for-his-last-20, Barry showed his disgust with the situation by melting down in front of the prying eyes of the beat writers. Tipping over a laundry bin and uttering something unfit for print, Barry is pretty much done. Oh he'll get his record, I'm sure. Just don't be surprised if that is all he does. He'll hit 7 or 8 more bombs, then call it quits. Whether it's a trip to the DL followed by an off season retirement, or a farewell tour filled with pinch hit at bats, this is it for Barry.

It's kind of fitting that the end is brought on by the Dodgers. That's baseball's great cycle I suppose.

Most Tradable Giant: Steve Kline

Kattobase Barnetto delivered an excellent analysis of the Giants' team dismantling options as baseball lurches toward the trade deadline, like a drunken Bengie Molina careening toward a postgame buffet. His piece encapsulated just how the poor the team's trade options are: too many crappy veterans with too many years left on their contracts means not too many excited trade partners.

I would totally do the Feliz-for-scuffed-baseballs exchange, BTW.

Steve Kline is the Giant most likely to find a new home. Left-handed relief specialists are overrated, but they can be useful in the playoffs. You could argue that the 2002 Giants were an effective lefty reliever away from winning the World Series. For a team as bad as the 2007 Giants, there is no reason to devote a roster spot to a lefty specialist. When it gets to late July, general managers go nuts for left-handed relievers, and Kline makes reasonable money. It is unfortunate that Brian Sabean will be the one dealing Kline, because he would normally be his biggest suitor.

I imagine there will be pressure from baseball's broadcast partners to see Kline moved to a contender. Kline's dirty, never-washed cap is worth 25-30 closeups from Fox every time he makes an appearance. Joe Buck and Tim McCarver are already rehearsing their witty one-liners: "His cap is filthy? That CURVEBALL was filthy!" "That's right, Joe. He's a lefty, but he has the RIGHT to wear a dirty hat."



Meanwhile, Chris Berman is almost paralyzed by his options: Some kline of wonderful? Eine Kline-ah nachtmusik? Offer me solutions, offer me alternatives, but I de-Kline?

Make the trade happen, Sabean. Do it for Boomer. And do it for the television audience, because that hat is nearly as gross as Benitez's gut and Messenger's beard combined.

Tony La Russa and the All-Star Game

There is no All-Star Game as magical as baseball's Midsummer Classic, especially when the manager is Tony La Russa. La Russa did not disappoint, as there were many classic Tony elements to the game:

1. Double-switching

When you're managing the All-Star Game in a National League park, there is an added challenge to dealing with the bloated, 32-man roster, due to the absence of the designated hitter. However, the main benefit to a double-switch is that it allows a team to avoid or delay a weak-hitting pitcher's plate appearance. In an All-Star game, pitchers only bat if there's an unusually long first-inning rally. In addition, La Russa only used each pitcher for single inning.

What was the real benefit to the excessive double-switching? For one, it showed America that Tony La Russa is a strategic genius. It also screwed over anyone foolish enough to try and keep score of the All-Star Game. I used to be quite passionate about scoring baseball games when I was little, even as young as age five. Though I was to young to stay up past the sixth inning, I insisted that my father complete the scorecard. The 1986 Game was a classic for me and headache for my dad, as he had to both shoehorn in extra names into the tiny space available, as well as figure out how to score an eighth inning featuring a passed ball, a balk, and a strikeout victim reaching first on a wild pitch.

2. Refusing to use his powerful pinch-hitters

The ninth inning ended with the bases loaded and Aaron Rowand at the plate. Aaron Rowand?!? Albert Pujols, still one of the most feared hitters in baseball even during a down year, could only watch from the bench. I assumed Pujols had an unreported injury, but no, Tony was making sure the team was prepared for extra innings that never came. It's not an unprecedented situation for Tony.

In the 2000 playoffs, the St. Louis Cardinals had a loaded team, including a hobbled Mark McGwire. McGwire couldn't run the bases, but he could pinch-hit. To maximize his value, La Russa had to find a high-leverage pinch-hitting situation where McGwire could not be walked intentionally. La Russa failed. In two games, McGwire never got off the bench. In another, McGwire got up to pinch-hit after a double, at which point he was walked intentionally. McGwire finished the series 0-for-2 with a walk, and St. Louis lost in five games.

3. Wearing his cap like a dork.



Just like always.

The Jerseys of Fan Fest

I work close to the ballpark in San Francisco, and even closer to the Fan Fest, which means I am at Ground Zero of the All-Star festivities. The neighborhood is swarmed by people wearing baseball stuff. Giants gear predominates, but jerseys range from Milwaukee ("The good land") to Tampa Bay ("Not actually the name of a city"). I have seen five Florida Marlins jerseys this week (four Cabreras, one Willis), which is more Marlins jerseys than I have seen in my entire life, even though I attended Game One of the Marlins-Giants Division Series in 2003.

My sister also works in the area, and is slightly perturbed by so much baseball enthusiasm. She put it thusly:

"Kid in full baseball uniform = Cute
Full grown adult fan in baseball uniform = Not so cute"

I've seen a few people wearing baseball pants along with the jersey, which changes the look from "fan" to "potential impostor". For the casual baseball fan, white polyester pants are not a forgiving item of clothing. When I see a person like this, it's hard not to wonder, "Is he wearing a cup, too?"

The official All Star batting practice jersey is also quite popular, which is somewhat understandable this year, due to the swanky, SF-specific design:



It's odd to see the jerseys from previous All-Star games represented. The man wearing the 2001 National League batting practice jersey is saying, "I'm willing to spend over $100 on a jersey to prove I attended a baseball game." (Jerseys are also available at mlb.com) It's a jersey that is appropriate two, possibly three days a year, depending on how you feel about the All-Star Legends and Celebrity Softball Game.

Of course, it's possible that the guy really is just a huge fan of the National League. He doesn't have affection for any particular team that matches the passionate hatred he has for the designated hitter. He sometimes can't bring himself to pay that much attention to the World Series, because it's always such a letdown after the NLCS. There's a framed photo of Chub Feeney above his desk at work. The Home Run Derby is dead to him, now that they've abandoned the league-vs-league format. More than once, he's composed a sonnet about the double-switch. He still hasn't accepted the Brewers because of their previous association with the upstart "Junior Circuit".

When the All-Star Break ends, they'll go back to their usual routine. Making roster moves in their NL-only fantasy league, writing angry letters denouncing Edgar Martinez's Hall of Fame candidacy, and watching exactly half of Baseball Tonight every evening. The jerseys go back in the closet for another year, and the league fans sigh, hoping against hope that the 2008 jersey, from Yankee Stadium, just might feature pinstripes.

Besty on the Block

The Giants are 10 games shy of .500 and sit at the bottom of the NL West. The Padres and Dodgers are legitimate squads and the Diamondbacks and Rockies, while crummy teams, seem to have our number. The orange and black rest more than 10 games out of first and it seems fairly clear that there won't be a miraculous stretch run. So what do we, as Giants fans, have to look forward to...

- Tomorrow their crib will be full of patrons buying $9.00 beers and $75.00 All-star Game 2007 sweatshirts.
- A week or two after that, Barry Bonds will break Hank's home run record.

That's pretty much it, no pennant chase, no World Series. Brian Sabean is left to retool, and at this point his best option is to set up a garage sale right outside the gates of AT&T Park. It seems likely that, with a few notable exceptions, everything is for sale.

- Barry Bonds: Not that there would be any takers. Nobody but the Giants wanted him during his last two trips through free agency (despite what his agent might tell you). Why would anyone want him via trade. Garage Sale Price: Big name, can't-miss-prospect (Included in the deal, is a second half headache).

- Ray Durham: There may be someone who might be interested, but he did just sign a big contract after a career year, and is currently batting just a smidgen over .250. Garage Sale Price: Bullpen help, and willingness to absorb salary.

- Mark Sweeney, Ryan Klesko & Rich Aurillia: Sweeny is a pinch hitting machine, Klesko is a lefty who is aching to DH, Aurillia has positional flexibility. Garage Sale Price: Player to be named later, OBO.

- Pedro Feliz: Is there a worse third base situation in baseball? Garage Sale Price: A sack of used baseballs.

- Omar Vizquel: It seems unlikely that anyone would really want Vizquel, he's too pricey to be a backup and not good enough (at least the 2007 Omar) to play every day for a contender. However, should Derek Jeter break his ankle, anything is possible. Garage Sale Price: Mid-level positional prospect.

- Dave Roberts: Who knew he was such a defensive liability? Really though, does he do anything that Fred Lewis can't (other than buy beer without a fake ID). Garage Sale Price: A modicum of bullpen help.

- last, but by no mean least... "Besty," Matt Morris

In spring 2006 my wife, Jessica and I took a trip to Phoenix. We were actually in town for the World Baseball Classic (which by the way, I am still a big fan of). We did get a chance to take in a couple of Spring Training games. There, Jessica got her first introduction to Matt Morris, who had just been acquired by the Giants.



Before he'd even thrown his first official pitch as a Giant, Jessica had already proclaimed Matt Morris her, "Besty." I never really received a satisfactory explanation of why he was crowned "Besty." Maybe it was because there were so many new faces on the Giants squad, and aside from Barry Bonds she needed someone new to root for. Or maybe it has something to do with the beard. At the time we both had similar facial hair going on.

Matt Morris has recently shaved his beard. Is it the first sign that "Besty" is not long for Los Gigantes? He stands at 7-and-5 on the worst team in the division with a 3.55 ERA. Not so bad. He does carry a pretty hefty price tag. Give or take a few million, he's got $5,000,000 coming to him for the remainder of this year and $10,000,000 due in 2008. So "Besty" comes with a fairly heavy price tag. That being said, Mark Buehrle, just got 4 years and $56,000,000.

As the Giants best piece of trade bait, "Besty" should garner them a real prospect, something along the lines of Lastings Milledge. The Mets outfield prospect, Milledge has been involved in just about every single "deal-that-should've-been" for the last 3 years. I don't mention Milledge because I've got an inside scoop or anything, it's just that he's the kind of prospect the Giants need to target, young, skilled, and on the doorstep of the Major Leagues. Garage Sale Price: Lastings Milledge.

July 31st is the trade deadline. Expect the Giants to be sellers, regardless of when Barry hits his historic home run. Expect 3 or 4 Giants to hit the road, and if you see my wife out walking the dog, pass along your suggestions for a new "Besty."

July 7th: Giants 7, Cardinals 6

San Francisco took their fifth game of the season from St. Louis when the Cardinals committed four errors in a 7-6 loss. Aaron Miles committed three errors in one inning, an inning where the Giants not coincidentally scored four runs.

The Giants have now guaranteed a split on the always-dangerous Cincinnati-St. Louis road trip. Based on no empirical evidence whatsoever, I have always considered this road trip to be cursed for the Giants. These two cities always seem fraught with bad luck: Blown saves, walkoff home runs, moths swirling all over the outfield, all kinds of stuff. But today, the Giants were the beneficiaries of good fortune. what could have made their luck change?



Well perhaps it was the baseball gods, frowning on the hypocrisy of St. Louis fans. I can remember a time when the St. Louis fans were pretty excited when a long-standing home run record was being challenged, even though the man chasing the mark was the target of steroid rumors. In fact, the Mark McGwire Highway still runs through St. Louis. Maybe this disgust comes from their manager, Tony LaRussa, who managed Jose Canseco when he was injecting McGwire in the Oakland clubhouse. Or maybe St. Louis fans don't mind performance-enhancing drugs, as long as it is Caucasian players taking them.

Regardless of the reason, Miles played like the ghost of Abner Doubleday had scattered pebbles across the St. Louis infield, and the Giants reaped the benefits. Would they be able to complete the sweep with Barry Zito on the mound Sunday? (No.)

July 6th: Giants 4, Cardinals 3

It was a difficult ninth inning, but the Giants beat the Cardinals, 4-3. To me, the story of the day was not so much the players who participated in the victory, but the haunting echo of Giants now lost to the sands of time/the Florida Marlins.

Bruce Bochy pulled nominal closer Brad Hennessey early in the ninth inning in favor of lefty Jack Taschner. Then, he replaced Taschner with Randy Messenger to get the final out. Messenger got it done, and everyone went home unhappy in St. Louis.



Messenger was acquired for the Giants old closer, the hated Armando Benitez. Both pitchers are hard to watch. For Benitez, it was his incompetence on the mound, but also his bloated frame, his repellant, fleshy body. Benitez's corpulence sent a message to fans: "My salary is $7.6 million, but not a penny of that goes to exercise equipment."

Messenger is hard to watch mainly because he has a gross beard, a thin line of facial hair that traces the line of his jaw. He could easily shave it off and look normal, whereas Benitez would face a long road of dieting, jogging, and probably a series of painful liposuction procedures before looking decent.

However, Benitez is fat due to laziness, poor diet, gluttony, what have you. Messenger's awful beard speaks to a fundamental weakness in his character, some broken thing inside him that says, "I took a great deal of care to make my face look like this. I believe that for an adult man, someone who appears on television, who is a role model for children, this is an acceptable way to look." Benitez can diet; that part of Randy Messenger's psyche won't just go away.

In other exiled-and-hated Giants news, former middle infielder Neifi Perez
tested positive for a controlled substance and was suspended. It is profoundly sad that Neifi, who Aaron Gleeman persuasively argued as the worst hitter in baseball history, only achieved those "heights" with the aid of performance-enhancing drugs.

It is mind-boggling to imagine what a drug-free Neifi Perez's would do offensively, since the only way he could hurt his team more on offensive would involve kneecapping his teammates in the on-deck circle, running the bases backwards, and relaying the third base coach's signals directly to the opposing manager. He already slides head-first into first base all the time, so that's covered.

The Tigers are "punished" by being deprived of Neifi's services for the next 25 games, which might be enough to set them apart from the other AL Central contenders. We miss you, Neifi.

July 5th: Reds 6, Giants 3

The Reds beat the Giants 6-3 in the final game of their three-game series on Thursday. SFGate's sports staff is having some fun with the disappointing season:

1. The lead photo features Pedro Feliz being thrown out at second base, with the caption, "Not So Happy Peter". I didn't know that Molly-style nicknaming had spread so far. However, I'm not sure that "Unhappy Peter" would have been such a bad caption. It seems that the photo editors are following the Handley-inspired Squelch office Mp3-naming conventions, which led to such folders as "(not so)hip-hop", for rap music that was kind of dorky.

Also: "Peter" means "penis". Ha.

2. Henry Schulman chooses interesting language to discuss Cincinnati's general inability to win series:

Never before has the word "rubber" been uttered so much on the radio in the Queen City, as in, "The Reds can't win the rubber game of a series to save their lives."

This may or may not be true, depending on whether Venus Flytrap ever did safe sex PSAs on WKRP.

3. The Betting Fool rips on the All-Star Game in another SFGate column, and uses the nickname "Drugged Earwig" for baseball commissioner Bud Selig. I agree with the Fool's main thesis which is: The All-Star Game sorta sucks. This Giants season was built on the foundation of events that sell lots of tickets, but have very little to do with competitive baseball. The Barry Bonds home run chase and the All-Star Game are both very effective means to sell season tickets, and they're both going to be over at roughly the same time. Attention bargain-hunting Giants fans: there's going to be a lot of scalped tickets available in August.

Bonds has said he won't compete in the Home Run Derby, needing to reserve his old man strength for pursuing Aaron and nothing else. It's reminiscent of Westley in The Princess Bride, lying down to conserve his strength for his confrontation with Prince Humperdinck. In this analogy, Victor Conte is Miracle Max, Greg Anderson is Princess Buttercup, and the six-fingered man is, of course, Antonio Alfonseca. To the pain, Hammerin' Hank!


Will the Giants get back in the playoff chase? It'll take a miracle.

July 4th: Giants 9, Reds 5

The Giants defeated the Reds 9-5 in an Independence Day battle in Cincinnati. If the game were part of the American Revolution, who would the stars of this game be?

George Washington: Matt Cain. Cain has been a master strategist on the mound this season, constrained only by a lack of material support. For months, the Giants hitters have been essentially wintering at Valley Forge, unable to launch anything offensive. Matt Cain also once cut down a cherry tree with his fastball.

Benedict Arnold: Rich Aurilia. Aurilia spent 2005 and 2006 in a Reds uniform, but switched sides for more money. He betrayed the Reds in the fourth inning by legging out an infield hit ahead of Fred Lewis's grand slam, though, like Benedict Arnold, Aurilia's legs are ruined. Rich also used his turncoat knowledge of the Reds pitching staff to hit an impressive sixth-inning home run off Ricky Stone.

General Horatio Gates: Fred Lewis. Just as the Battle of Saratoga was the turning point of the Revolutionary War, the fourth inning was the turning point of yesterday's ballgame. Lewis, like Gates, deserves credit for his stirring performance, but the contributions of Aurilia, like those of Arnold, were underrated.

Francis Marion, the Swamp Fox: Ray Durham. Durham's quick bat provided a surprise attack against the Reds bullpen, like the guerilla techniques of the Swamp Fox.. Also, if you've ever heard Ray Durham's voice, it sounds like he grew up in a swamp.

Hessians: Cincinnati Red bullpen. Ineffective, underpaid mercenaries.

Second Continental Congress: Omar Vizquel. Vizquel made some costly errors, but no one cares because of the ultimate victory.